The Last Honest Movie Critic

Cyrus review

2010-08-15T13:38:00.000-07:00

Cyrus is a comedy drama film directed by Mark and Jay Duplass that tells the story of John, a frumpy middle-aged divorcee who miraculously attracts the attention of Molly, a highly attractive age-appropriate single mother. However, as the film's discourse moves forward we quickly realize that Molly is carrying more baggage than John may be able to handle in the form of her childish 21 year-old son, Cyrus. As John gets closer to Molly, Cyrus's behavior becomes more erratic, causing John to reevaluate whether or not he and Molly can be together.

My biggest gripe with Cyrus is that it was significantly more moody and less funny than I expected it to be. It also begged the question as to what kind of a sick person would fake an anxiety disorder just to break up their mother and her boyfriend? In fact, I'd like to take this moment to approach my soapbox and say that only an evil, twisted, monster of a human-being would fake an anxiety disorder or a panic disorder to get attention. Furthermore, for a person to be in their 20's and still desire all of their mother's attention is absolutely sick! However, in the scope of Cyrus these moments also provided for some particularly funny scenes, albeit many of these were a tad frustrating to watch. However, I solemnly believe that the reason I was frustrated on behalf of poor John was because actor, John C. Reilly, and the Duplass brothers did an extraordinary job of creating an endearing character.

All moodiness aside, considering the dramatic arc of Cyrus, Jonah Hill does a great job of stepping out of his comfort zone to play the title character of this film. Although Hill does bring a lot of comedy to the role, there are a few scenes that call for him to step up dramatically and he answers the call skillfully and with a lot of range. In fact, there are moments in Cyrus where Jonah Hill is downright creepy.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Cyrus is a moody dramedy about loneliness and second chances. Although the laughs exist, they take a back seat to the drama. However, watching Jonah Hill play Marisa Tomei's creepy Oedipus channeling son is definitely worth a rental. 3/5

Pirate Radio review

2010-08-13T22:54:00.000-07:00

Pirate Radio (AKA The Boat that Rocked, UK title) is a nostalgic glimpse into the 1960's rock & roll subculture that does an extraordinary job of capturing the magic of rock & roll. Written and Directed by Richard Curtis, Pirate Radio has every bit as much heart as Curtis's last directorial effort, Love Actually. However, what makes this film particularly special is the incredibly authentic ensemble cast, the quick narrative pace, and the abundance of intriguing sub-plots.

The most fascinating aspect of Pirate Radio's ensemble cast is their ability to share screen time with one another, which results in difficulty discerning a single main character. Then again, in the scope of Pirate Radio this tactic works well to improve the narrative's flow, which is good considering that the majority of this film is set on a small ship. Furthermore, by having several main characters, the audience is rewarded with a fast paced story in which the emphasis is placed on the time period as well as the music.

Another special aspect of Pirate Radio is that underneath all of the fun and rock & roll is a ton of angst that comes as a result of an entire radio crew being crammed on a boat for years on end. In these dire circumstances characters are faced with some extremely interesting problems involving lust, betrayal, boredom, and... paternity? Given the limited setting possibilities of Pirate Radio, Curtis did a wonderful job of spinning straw into gold with his incredibly well-developed narrative.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Pirate Radio is a wonderful movie that is filled with interesting characters, awesome music, and loads of fun sub-plots. There is a villain, there are love interests, there are problems, but the real star of this movie is 1960's era rock & roll music. Pirate Radio is boat loads of fun and you would be a fool to miss out on it. 5/5

The Other Guys review

2010-08-10T16:49:00.000-07:00

The Other Guys starring Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg and directed by long-time Ferrell collaborator, Adam McKay, is a really funny movie that may be too quirky for its own good. However, unlike Adam Sandler movies, which are blatant assaults on our intelligence (Grown Ups wasn't even worthy of a review), Adam McKay's movies do an extraordinary job of deliberately experimenting with different kinds of humor. However, the problem with experimental comedy is that, like in all experiments, it may not result in the desired outcome. Although McKay and company do hit a few foul balls, they also manage to hit a lot of their jokes out of the park.

The best part of The Other Guys is the remarkable chemistry between Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg. As it turns out, when Wahlberg steps back from being a badass he has the potential to be extremely funny and his awkward tough guy routine provides a perfect balance with Will Ferrell's unlikely super cop character. Together these guys are comic gold and they manage to put a fresh spin on a couple of stock characters that shouldn't be nearly this funny.

Although Ferrell and Wahlberg steal the show, The Other Guys also has a great supporting cast filled with talented actors such as Eva Mendes, Michael Keaton, and seasoned funny-man, Steve Koogan. Furthermore, their talent does not go to waste because of the fact that beneath the hijinks lies a very funny story that pays homage to the dire state of the United States economy and redirects our opinions on who the true bad guys really are.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The Other Guys is a really funny movie. It's not the funniest movie I've ever seen, but it has some extremely funny sequences and the story is immensely satirical and even a little thought provoking. All in all, this is a major step in the right direction for Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg and another solid notch on Adam McKay's belt. 3/5

Inception review

2010-08-10T16:04:00.000-07:00

In 2008 Christopher Nolan wowed critics, audiences, and box office charts with his cinematic masterpiece, The Dark Knight. Now, two years later, Christopher Nolan has been granted the power to do pretty much whatever he wants with his films and he has embraced this power wholeheartedly with his latest film, Inception. Inception is probably the most expensive-looking film that this critic has ever seen and fortunately for us it comes packaged with a compelling story that pushes the boundaries of our minds and how we perceive reality.

Although the story is woven tightly together, it is apparent that Christopher Nolan accomplished the task of literally creating his own unique world, or maybe several, when he made Inception.

Unfortunately, Inception is proof of the fact that a filmmaker can be too creative in certain instances. With that said, there are moments in Inception where the viewer will feel like they are playing a card game with a six year old because, like a six year old, Inception makes up the rules as it goes along. In more than one instance, just when we think all hope for our heroes is lost a new rule emerges to save them just in time. Although Nolan is skilled enough to explain all of these twists and turns, the world, or worlds, he has created may be too ambitious for any filmmaker to tackle with complete coherence, therefore, I will refrain from dwelling on this for too long.

Although Inception definitely has some quirks that are a bit hard to swallow, the overall product is absolutely mesmerizing. The vast, gravity-defying cities filled with endless sidewalks and a jumble of interesting landmarks are a sight to behold. Furthermore, the action sequences are jaw-dropping and suspenseful. Then again, the emotionally driven performance given to us by the great Leonardo DiCaprio may be what saves this film from being just another big-budget solute to special effects. DiCaprio's ability to find the right emotion at any given moment of any given scene and deliver it with complete authenticity is astounding and I pray that movie-goers aren't taking his unique ability for granted.

All in all, Inception is not a perfect film, but it is close. The story's twists and turns are explained but they are delivered in an expository way that makes them feel forced at times. However, considering the fact that Christopher Nolan managed to cram a story that theoretically could have continued forever into a modest 148 minutes is a testament to how talented of a filmmaker he truly is. By the way, in case I didn't make it clear I will promise you that Inception will not make you bored. There is always something happening in this movie and it is always important to the narrative.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Inception is remarkable. It is original, exciting, visually spectacular, and did I mention it stars Leonardo DiCaprio? If you miss this film, then it is truly your loss.

4/5

Get Him to the Greek review

2010-06-25T17:42:00.000-07:00

Get Him to the Greek is Nicholas Stoller's directorial follow-up to Forgetting Sarah Marshal, and like Forgetting Sarah Marshal, this raunchy comedy has as much heart as it does laughs; and fortunately for us, Get Him to the Greek has plenty of laughs. Furthermore, Get Him to the Greek is a spin-off of Forgetting Sarah Marshal in that it follows fictitious rock and roll icon, Aldous Snow, who was a supporting character in the aforementioned film. Confused yet? I hope not, because Get Him to the Greek is definitely worth a look and though it lives in Sarah Marshal's world, this is an entirely unique film with little resemblance to its equally successful counterpart.

The plot of Get Him to the Greek is whacky, plausible, and hilariously original. It centers around a young record company intern named Aaron Green who must find the allusive rock and roll legend, Aldous Snow, and get him to the Greek Theatre in Hollywood in time for his reunion concert. Anyone familiar with the character, Aldous Snow, knows that shenanigans inevitably ensue and poor Aaron Green is forced to keep up in spite of the abounding madness. However, Get Him to the Greek does not rely on slap-stick and circumstantial humor alone. In fact, beneath its outrageous exterior lies well-developed characters with interesting problems.

Possibly the biggest surprise of Get Him to the Greek is the expertise exuded by the ensemble cast. I was skeptical about seeing rapper/music mogul Sean Combs (you may know him as P. Diddy, Puff Daddy, Puffy, or simply Diddy) as one of the prevalent supporting characters; however, I admit that he did a terrific job and he was hilarious in certain scenes, most notably the Geoffrey scene. Furthermore, Russell Brand once again brought Aldous Snow to life and Jonah Hill's natural screen presence was as good as ever. Other note-worthy cast members are Colm Meaney and Rose Byrne, who play Aldous's father and ex-wife respectively.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Get Him to the Greek is a fun fast-paced rock and roll comedy with interesting characters and a lot of heart within its compelling narrative. Although much of the humor is incredibly dirty, this is a comedy that like-minded adults will inevitably enjoy. However, before entering the theater it should be noted that although this is a spin-off of Forgetting Sarah Marshal, this is a completely different kind of movie. 4/5

A Nightmare on Elm Street review

2010-05-03T12:27:00.000-07:00

A Nightmare on Elm Street is a welcome update to a 26 year old franchise and it is also acclaimed music video director, Samuel Bayer's, foray into feature film directing. All in all, this movie is a success and adds a lot of narrative weight to the series by offering a much needed backstory and darker take on the character, Freddy Krueger. However, even though much of the movie is fresh, I was disappointed by a few scenes that were identical to the original 1984 film. Although it was interesting to see these iconic scenes redone, the suspense will be lost on those familiar with the original. With that said, audience members who are unfamiliar with the original A Nightmare on Elm Street will be pleased.

One of A Nightmare on Elm Street's strongest attributes in the psychological weight that the story carries. The concept that a monster has the ability to kill a person in their dreams is just as frightening today as when it was conceived and the elaborate set designs and mood driven cinematography make it all the more scary. Furthermore, the pacing of the story is delightfully unconventional in the sense that it is difficult to identify the characters that will survive versus the ones that will succumb to Freddy's gloved hand.

Although Samuel Bayer does exhibit good horror filmmaking chops, Jackie Earle Haley's performance as Freddy Krueger is the X-factor that sets A Nightmare on Elm Street apart from Platinum Dunes' previous attempts at horror remakes. As both a monster and a whimsical pre-school groundskeeper, Haley plays Freddy with the same expertise and style he used for his previous roles in Little Children and The Watchmen. Furthermore, the character, Freddy Krueger, has evolved significantly thanks in part to Haley, an amazing make-up team, and a good writing effort by Wesley Strick and Eric Heisserer. For instance, Freddy is significantly more menacing than the Robert Englund version and his sense of humor is much more dark.

THE HONEST TRUTH: A Nightmare on Elm Street was a franchise with a lot to gain from a reboot. Fortunately, the right steps were made and the result is a very good horror film with a brand new take on an iconic character. Fans of the series will be able to appreciate the newly created character development and backstory of Freddy Krueger and the new audience will be able to enjoy a very well-done horror film. 3/5

Hot Tub Time Machine review

2010-04-19T13:47:00.000-07:00

Hot Tub Time Machine, directed by Steve Pink, is proof that any concept, no matter how absurd, can make for a great movie if handled properly. Underneath Hot Tub Time Machine's crude humor and familiar set-up lies a film that nails the time-traveling formula by providing an amazing re-creation of the 1980's. The music, wardrobe, and character motivations reflect the kind of 1980's nostalgia and attitude that no films or T.V. shows have managed to do since the 1980's.

The performances in Hot Tub Time Machine are based around the male comradery formula that made The Hangover such a success. Although there are some definite tweaks in the characters, they all fall into the formula of the regular guy, the loser, and the eccentric. However, in Hot Tub Time Machine the fourth guy plays a much bigger role than Justin Bartha did in The Hangover and he is played by up-and-comer Clark Duke.

Although Hot Tub Time Machine does have obvious similarities to The Hangover in terms of its relatable male characters, the resemblance ends there. Hot Tub Time Machine is much more comical and its use of supernatural elements is at the core of its humor. With that said, none of the jokes are very sophisticated but they are incredibly clever and they make great use of the time-traveling concept.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Hot Tub Time Machine is a surprisingly hilarious tribute to the 80's that showcases some up-and-coming Hollywood talent. The story, though ridiculous, never apologizes for being so far-fetched and you'll be glad you decided to enjoy it. 4/5

Kick Ass review

2010-04-19T12:48:00.000-07:00

Kick Ass, directed by Matthew Vaughn, is the newest comic book adaptation to hit the silver screen. Although Kick Ass is definitely one of the better comic book movies I've seen lately, it loses its focus causing the tone to change from realistic to comical. This change in tone is arguably detrimental to the film; however, when Kick Ass is at its best, it is extraordinary!

Never would I have imagined that my mildly chauvinistic mind would process an eleven year old girl kicking the snot (and entrails) out of gargantuan men; but Matthew Vaughn's action sequences are so well crafted that I was too busy cheering to notice any faults. With that said, the violence in Kick Ass is what pushes the action into realism. Although, Hit Girl, played with expertise by the talented Chloe Grace Moretz, may be small in stature, her adult vocabulary and amazingly smooth work with a blade gave the fight scenes credibility; not to mention the fact that we literally watch her cartwheel across the screen leaving behind a trail of dismembered bad guys. The fight scenes are so satisfying, compelling, and gruesome, that they made Tarantino's Kill Bill series look like child's play.

Although Hit Girl and her counterpart, Big Daddy (Nicholas Cage), are the best part of Kick Ass, the narrative is delivered from the perspective of Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson), a geeky teen who takes on the persona of Kick Ass. Lizewski's mundane existence provides an interesting contrast between the typical conflicted superhero archetypes that film-goers have become saturated with. In addition, his everyday man style of crime fighting is equally unique; especially when he spends most of his time getting his ass kicked as opposed to kicking ass like his name would imply. Dace Lizewski is comparable to Peter Parker, but without the powers, which makes it more satisfying watching Lizewski succeed in all aspects of his life, including a compelling romance with his high school crush, who happens to think he's gay.

With amazing action, complete with a stunning amount of realistic violence, not to mention a story full of heart, it becomes incredibly frustrating when Kick Ass falters. Instead of following his already winning formula of highly graphic violence, Vaughn jumps the shark in his final scene, which frustrated the BaJesus out of me. *SPOILER ALERT* To clarify, realistic superheroes should NEVER fly. Also, the casting of Christopher Mintz-Plasse as Red Mist should have been rethought for the sake of the ending and the potential sequel. However, I admit that these flaws are amplified by the fact that Kick Ass was near perfect until the final act; which may argue in favor of seeing the film and/or adding it to your Blu Ray collection.

In the end, Kick Ass is an ultra violent comic book movie in the vein of Kill Bill and Wanted with some Spiderman thrown in for good measure. The story is full of heart and the characters are extremely interesting. Furthermore, there is plenty of comic relief from Lizewski's friends, including Hot Tub Time Machine alum, Clark Duke. Even though the ending is a frustrating change in the film's tone, Kick Ass is definitely a unique film that succeeds on nearly every level and will push the super hero genre forward.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Hit Girl steals this movie. Between her sharp tongue and even sharper blades, you'll find yourself cheering for an uber-violent eleven year old girl. However, there's so much in Kick Ass to enjoy in terms of story and character development that you will most certainly be engaged throughout the film's duration. 4/5

Green Zone review

2010-03-23T13:11:00.001-07:00

Every once in awhile a great political thriller will challenge your mind and ultimately change the way you think about a current issue. Green Zone, starring Matt Damon, is not that kind of movie. Directed by Brian Helgeland, this film is the most convoluted, slow-paced, stylistically irrelevant, piece of cinematic garbage I have ever been forced to sit through. With a great concept, our country's false justification for the war in Iraq, Green Zone should have been the most important political thriller of my generation; however, it is so slow that it becomes ultimately unwatchable.

Though it starts out with an interesting action sequence, the action in Green Zone ends quickly and is replaced by a narrative that takes two hours to tell a thirty minute story. Basically, if you want to hear about how bad the United States botched Iraq, then you're better off just tuning into CNN.

However, I admittedly might have found the narrative a tad more interesting if the cinematography wasn't so God awful. The camera shakes for the entire two hours and most of the shots are actually blurry. I have no idea why the director decided that this was a fitting style for a slow-paced political thriller, but he did. Unless you have an iron gut and are not susceptible to headaches, then avoid this film at all costs.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The only redeeming quality of Green Zone is a solid performance by Matt Damon. Other than that, it is absolute garbage and the horrific cinematography will probably make you sick. 0/5

The Crazies review

2010-03-23T12:38:00.000-07:00

The Crazies, directed by Breck Eisner, is a better-than-average viral outbreak thriller that will put you on the edge of your seat. Unfortunately, it suffers from a few shortcomings that will keep it from being a horror classic.

The concept, which is a remake of a 1973 George A. Romero film of the same name, is executed incredible well. During the first half of The Crazies I was completely engaged and perplexed. However, after the big reveal came near the middle of the film, I gradually became disappointed with the film's progression into mediocrity.

So what's the big issue? *SPOILER ALERT!* The strategy taken by the government to contain the viral outbreak in the town is mind-numbingly illogical; even by United States government standards. For instance, the government sends legions of troops into the town wearing hazardous materials suits. Their purpose is to round up the infected people and quarantine them. However, as The Crazies progresses, it is revealed that they massacred the uninfected people as well. But it doesn't end there. By the end of the film the military winds up blowing the town to pieces, begging the question as to why they even bothered to enter the town or quarantine anyone in the first place. It's all very nonsensical and it causes the film, which starts off great, to spiral into the realm of horror film monotony.

Sadly, the logic problems don't end there, and they wind up being the crippling factor for this film. The Crazies constantly fails to abide by its own rules resulting in an infection that acts differently in the veins of different characters. For instance, the less developed characters lose their minds instantly and become murderous psychopaths with no remorse. However, more developed characters gain the miraculous ability to control the disease for a time, thus resisting the urge to kill. When this happens it causes the film to lose it's stride in terms of authenticity and ultimately weakens the fear element.

Although the narrative pitfalls are frustrating to behold, it is only because The Crazies had mountains of potential that were realized in the first half of the film. It truly starts off with a bang that doesn't quit until the halfway mark. However, even with it all, the main characters, which are very well developed, manage to have frightening interactions with the towns' folk right down to the bitter end of the film. Watching the once rational people of the town transform into mindless killers is terrifying and in that respect The Crazies definitely hits its mark.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The Crazies may be littered with logic problems, yet it is a frightening film that is close to realizing its potential as George A. Romero's best told story. Anyone looking for a good scare will find it here because The Crazies is littered with suspense, grit, and mountains of corpses. 3/5

Legion review

2010-03-04T08:59:00.000-08:00

Scott Stewart's apocalyptic thriller, Legion, is a provocative glimpse into the wrath of God; but don't confuse this cautionary tale for cinematic martyrdom. The film's moral foundation is buried deep beneath mountains of shock value. With that said, Stewart does provide a great sense of isolation and his angels are terrifying. Then again, is the world ready for terrifying angels? I highly doubt it.

My biggest problem with Legion lies in the way that the angels are portrayed. Although the angels Michael and Gabriel are traditionally beautiful winged specimens, the majority of God's army has sharp teeth and beady eyes; features synonymous with demons. However, you won't be pondering the sacrilegious pretext for very long due to an overload of action sequences. Although many of the action sequences are satisfying and filled with Scott Stewart's signature visual effects, the action does distract from the film's highly religious central theme, which seems more than a tad irresponsible.

Another problem I have with Legion is that it is too convoluted to actually get its message across. By saturating this film with intense action sequences, it causes the theme to feel less authentic and more preachy. Furthermore, the preachiness quickly translates into poorly crafted dialogue causing the film to be incredibly cheesy at times.

Although Legion has some serious pitfalls, it does get some things right too. For instance, the action sequences, though superfluous, are very exciting and Stewart creates a very tense atmosphere. In addition, he takes some stylistic risks by injecting some contradictory images into the mix, i.e. angels with sharp teeth who curse. Although it does not work and may be irresponsible, I can praise Stewart for attempting to do something different.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Legion takes some serious risks yet they all feel painfully irresponsible. The world just isn't ready to see a film centered around a wrathful God that injects cursing demons into the world to kill all of mankind. However, if the aforementioned problem doesn't bother you, then you are in for an action-packed thrill ride that is interrupted by a few cheesy moments of pointless preaching. 2/5

Shutter Island review

2010-02-24T13:07:00.001-08:00

There is absolutely no way to properly review Martin Scorsese's Shutter Island without inadvertently dropping a few spoilers. With that said, I will give my best attempt at keeping them to a minimum for those who have not yet seen this engaging mystery thriller. Those who have read the novel from which this film was adapted know that Scorsese took on a mighty task in adapting Shutter Island into a film. With that said, due to great direction and a stellar cast, Shutter Island is a successful and engaging film that manages to stay true to the source material in nearly every way. However, although entertaining and effective, this film does have a few pitfalls that were unavoidable given the source material.

The narrative, which is told through the perspective of an unreliable narrator, is filled with a dizzying amount of twists and turns that may be difficult to keep up with. In addition, although the ending of Shutter Island works, it is crippled by a large amount of improbability. However, given that we have a common case of unreliable narrator, there is no telling what is real and what is false within the narrator's perspective and that must be considered when analyzing the events leading up to the ending.

The performances in Shutter Island largely compensate for the narrative pitfalls. Leonardo Dicaprio plays U.S. Marshal Teddy Daniels with the kind of expertise and focus that causes us to put every ounce of our faith into his character. This makes for a chilling turn of events when the ending is finally revealed. In addition, seasoned veteran, Ben Kingsley, does a fantastic job of bringing the hospital's chief of staff alive resulting in a remarkably endearing antagonist. However, the standout performance of Shutter Island is a brief appearance by Jackie Earle Haley, who gives us a chilling look into the paranoid mind of disfigured mental patient, George Noyce.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The discontinuous narrative, effective use of style, great performances, and provocative ending definitely make up for Shutter Island's improbable plot. All in all, Shutter Island is an intriguing mystery that will have every audience member questioning their instincts. 4/5

Crazy Heart review

2010-02-24T12:32:00.000-08:00

Crazy Heart, directed by Scott Cooper, is an amazing character study with a stellar narrative that explores themes of self-destruction, substance abuse, and aging. With that said, I would like to make it clear that Crazy Heart is much more than a film about country music; however, the country western atmosphere feels extremely authentic and the soundtrack is extraordinarily crafted. Furthermore, Jeff Bridges' Oscar winning performance as Otis "Bad" Blake is a winning ingredient in an already compelling film.

Crazy Heart's narrative is as authentic as it is engaging. In the first act of the film Bad makes his rounds on the independent music circuit by playing low paid gigs at a bowling alley and a bar. Although this may sound conventional, it is anything but. From the sleazy atmosphere, to the spot-on casting choices, each of these venues feels as if it were pulled directly from the American heartland.

As Crazy Heart progresses, the narrative definitely veers into a number of different directions; however, this should not be mistaken for a lack of focus. In fact, each scene is placed deliberately, allowing us to explore every aspect of Bad's character; including his upbringing. Furthermore, the film's climax is satisfying and hits hard with a heavy dose of realism.

Finally, I would be a fool to overlook the amazing performances by Jeff Bridges, Maggie Gyllenhaal, and the stellar supporting cast. Bridges externalizes every bit of charm, recklessness, and pain that Bad encompasses thus creating a character that we root for in spite of his shortcomings. Maggie Gyllenhaal is equally great in her role as Bad's love interest. Thanks to her grace and poise, the relationship between her character and Bad is entirely believable and engaging, despite their obvious age difference. In fact, after her character's initial hook-up with Bad, I was never once distracted by the age difference and the romance felt incredibly natural.

THE HONEST TRUTH: All in all, Crazy Heart is amazing work all across the board. Between Scott Cooper's authentic atmosphere, a thematically engaging narrative and Bridges' perfect performance, Crazy Heart is a must see for anyone who enjoys great cinema. 5/5

The Lovely Bones review

2010-02-15T13:35:00.000-08:00

Peter Jackson's latest film, The Lovely Bones, takes his credibility down a notch. Although it is visually striking, The Lovely Bones is destroyed by its lack of focus, overwhelmingly mediocre performances, and terrible ending. The subject matter here is delicate; a young girl (Saoirse Ronan) is lured into the den of a neighborhood pedophile/murderer and is killed. However, the killer (Stanley Tucci) is transparent enough to avoid suspicion, causing the little girl's family to become overwhelmed with grief. This makes for an incredibly emotional and intriguing story; however, with every satisfying twist comes an immense disappointment right down to the abrupt ending.

The set-up for this movie is fantastic. We are immediately driven into the quiet suburban world of Susie Salmon where we become emotionally invested in her and her family; despite mediocre performances by Ronan and Mark Wahlberg. Furthermore, the scene in which Susie is captured by Tucci's character is absolutely chilling. Watching this madman range from childlike to sociopathic behavior is terrifying; a performance deserving of its Oscar recognition. However, before long, we are taken on a journey into to heaven that, although beautiful, carries a lot of screen time but little story weight.

However, there are some truly suspenseful moments as the story progresses on Earth, but they fall flat due to the fact that they never result in any sort of cohesive ending. In fact, the ending of The Lovely Bones is about as disappointing as could be. Without giving it away, I will say that improbable divine intervention is no substitute for a father's revenge. Although the theme of "releasing the past" is important to Jackson's film, revenge is a much more suitable companion to the atrocities committed by the film's inherently evil antagonist. In other words, I would have much rather liked to have seen Wahlberg's character beat Tucci's character to a pulp than see Jackson's ending.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The Lovely Bones provides a beautiful look into an afterlife that we should all hope to one day see. However, this heavenly jaunt carries little weight within the central conflict of the story resulting in a complete and utter lack of focus. Then again, focus has never been Jackson's strong suit and the visuals are stunning. 3/5

Dear John review

2010-02-15T12:45:00.000-08:00

If one were to judge by the carefully crafted television spots and trailers put together for the film Dear John, directed by Lasse Hallstrom, one might think that this film has the same charm as the last Nicholas Sparks adaptation to hit the silver screen entitled The Notebook. However, those looking for the same heart-wrenching tribulations found in The Notebook would do best avoiding Dear John entirely.

Although the South Carolina setting is the same and the excruciatingly corny dialogue is still present, not much exists in terms of what made The Notebook a success. For instance, The Notebook's intrigue laid in the fact that a love was ruined by meddling parents and other external factors that were out of the two protagonists' control. However, in Dear John, we watch two fully capable adults make decisions to sabotage their love. Although their decisions are justified, they make it very difficult for the audience to believe that these two really love one another causing us to take sides. Therefore, I promise you will leave this movie disliking one, if not both, of the two lovers.

With that said, the inevitable contempt you'll have for the characters is only the tip of the ice-berg. What really makes Dear John awful are the little things. For instance, an entire subplot of this movie centers around Savannah's (Amanda Seyfried) passion for helping autistic people. However, the young man who plays the autistic boy next door is so unauthentic that it hurts. How do I know this? Because I work with this population and they act nothing like the boy in this movie! It was as if someone explained autism to this boy as opposed to introducing him to the population.

However, I must applaud Richard Jenkins for his performance as John's Asperger's inflicted father. Jenkins does a superb job of externalizing all of the little nuances of the condition while still maintaining the character's dignity and individuality. It was the only powerful performance of the movie. This isn't to say that every other performance was bad. Channing Tatum and Amanda Seyfried definitely show that they have talent; however, the material in Dear John is no Oscar vehicle.

Another problem with Dear John is the inevitable corniness that comes with the title's monstrously cheesy dual-meaning. Watching the character, John, actually read a "dear John" letter caused this reviewer to snicker during the film's most blatant attempt at sorrow. However, even if you don't have the same sophomoric sense of humor as I do, you'll have a tough time feeling sorry for a guy who sabotaged his own relationship by re-enlisting into the army. Note to men, if you want to build a meaningful relationship out of a two week fling, then don't leave your girlfriend for three more years than you have to. Duh!

THE HONEST TRUTH: Dear John is bad even by chick-flick standards. I have no idea what it has in common with the book it was adapted from, but I can only hope that the book is much better. With that said, there are a few sweet moments that will have women swooning, but they are few and far between. 2/5

Funny People review

2010-01-31T19:35:00.000-08:00

Funny People is the third film directed by Judd Apatow and it strays far from his usual comedic formula. In fact, referring to this movie as a comedy would be terribly inaccurate, fore this film is not a comedy but a drama about comedians. With that said, Funny People is not a perfect film but it is a highly original concept fused with a highly unpredictable narrative that blows away any semblance of conventional story-telling. The result is a heartfelt movie that provides an honest look into the world of stand-up comedy.

Although Funny People is daring, its biggest pit-fall is its lack of a sympathetic protagonist; or any sympathetic character for that matter. The characters in this movie betray, disappoint, and lie to each other. However, this pit-fall comes with a purpose and that purpose is to explore the film's central theme which is the price of fame; but that doesn't mean we have to like it. In fact, this movie could just have easily been titled Unlikable People.

Adam Sandler plays George Simmons, an actor/comedian who has sacrificed love, friendship, family, and credibility in order to achieve an enormous amount of wealth and success. However, after discovering he has cancer, George begins to re-evaluate his priorities and attempts to reacquaint himself with his two loves; stand-up comedy and his ex-girlfriend, Laura, played by Leslie Mann.

Seth Rogan plays Ira Wright, a deli worker who aspires to become a great stand-up comedian but can only find unpaid gigs at local comedy clubs. After making some jokes at George's expense one night, Ira is ironically asked by George to become his new joke writer and personal assistant. Before long, Ira is swept into George's world of excess and is paid handsomely to go along for the ride. However, George is always quick to remind Ira just how replaceable he is.

Although interesting, these two characters are problematic in the way they treat those closest to them making it very difficult to relate to them or their struggles. For instance, George spends the first half of the film seeking redemption for his heartless ways; however, soon after realizing his cancer is in remission he goes back to being a heartless weasel by choosing to traumatize Laura's marriage in an attempt to win her back. Then again, Laura's husband is never developed into anything more than a pompous jock whose infidelities have already strained his marriage; yet another unlikable character. Furthermore, Laura is equally unlikable when she chooses to stay by his side at the end of the film after cheating on him with George. With that said, I would like to state that every character in this movie, with the exception of George's doctor, is unlikable to some degree due to their dishonest behavior and it can be exhausting watching 146 minutes of unlikable characters.

Although I cannot defend Apatow's decision to make each of his characters unlikable, I can understand that his purpose for doing so was to provide a realistic look into the grittiness of show business by depicting how cutthroat it can truly be. Furthermore, this bold decision emphasized the film's theme, which is, once again, the price of fame. In considering this, I feel like Funny People must be very personal to Judd Apatow, possibly representing aspects of his own journey into show-business. Therefore, it does not surprise me that the narrative sacrifices all of the necessary conventions that provide for a traditional movie. However, although the entertainment value takes a back-seat to the realism, Apatow accomplishes his goal of depicting the true nature of show-business and stand-up comedy.

THE HONEST TRUTH: This movie is incredibly interesting and it is unlike anything Judd Apatow has created thus far. By infusing Funny People with a heavy dose of realism from the casting choices to the narrative, this movie has more in common with neo-realist fare like Salam Bombay and Kids than it does with The 40 Year Old Virgin and Knocked Up. Although Funny People is not a crowd-pleaser, it will have film aficionados swooning. 4/5

The Hurt Locker review

2010-01-14T12:46:00.000-08:00

The Hurt Locker, directed by Kathryn Bigelow, is the best film that has ever been made about the Iraq War and it will always be the best film that has ever been made about the Iraq War. Although many films have explored the psychology of war, a director has never made it unique to this particular war and she does so by investigating the way that it is fought. For instance, our enemy does not fight this war in a uniform or even with a gun (in most cases) and they have no way of matching our state of the art technology. Therefore, homemade explosives have become the Iraqi insurgents' weapon of choice and The Hurt Locker explores the psyche of the men who are sent in to disarm these explosives.

Jeremy Renner turns in a brilliant performance as Staff Sergeant William James; a man who has disarmed hundred of IED's (improvised explosive devices) during his time in Iraq. However, James has more complexity than meets the eye. His fine-tuned ability to disarm explosives has given him legendary status amongst the other soldiers in Iraq causing him to prefer warfare to the monotony of everyday life in the United States.

The idea that "war is a drug" (Chris Hedges) is one that Kathryn Bigelow explores through her depiction of James; however, she gives us this message with a great amount of subtlety by choosing to show James' struggle rather than having the characters explain it to us. For instance, when we see James participating in traditional suburban family life he does not have a conventional stress induced melt down or a violent confrontation with his wife. In fact, we see him go through the motions of a father and a husband without hesitation. However, further inspection shows us that James' conflict with normalcy is ever apparent and his struggle is not with warfare, but with trying to survive a life without the thrills and recognition that warfare provides him.

The authentic tone and setting of The Hurt Locker are complemented by stellar film-making on behalf of Bigelow that can be considered nothing less than fearless. The Hurt Locker oozes with suspense right from the very first scene and the rest of the film follows suit. Furthermore, watching the gut-wrenching battle tactics used by the insurgents is chillingly disturbing and Bigelow refuses to relieve the violence for the sake of a mass-audience. All in all, this film shows every bit of ugliness encompassed by war with the kind of accuracy that will make even the most hardened of audiences cringe.

THE HONEST TRUTH: For its fearless use of the medium, original concept, stellar performances, and accurate portrayal of the Iraq War, I am choosing to endorse The Hurt Locker whole-heartedly as a top contender for the best picture of the year. Kathryn Bigelow has earned her place among the great directors and we will all be seeing more of Jeremy Renner come Oscar time. 5/5

Sherlock Holmes review

2010-01-13T14:59:00.000-08:00

Guy Ritchie's newest film, Sherlock Holmes, is an experimental and inventive adaptation of Arthur Conan Doyle's famous character. Although the film has very little to do with anything that Doyle ever wrote about in his famous works, it is interesting to watch Guy Ritchie's contemporary take on the character. Furthermore, the excellence with which Robert Downey Junior plays Holmes is nothing short of extraordinary. However, his skill hardly overshadows the talented ensemble cast consisting of Jude Law, Rachel McAdams, and Mark Strong.

The directorial style Ritchie uses in Sherlock Holmes is brilliantly implemented and, unlike in many stylistic films, adds to the story in terms of establishing Holmes's character. For instance, a visual representation of Holmes's thought process during fight scenes is implemented in order to add credibility to the notion that the new Sherlock Holmes is a skilled combatant. However, at times Ritchie pushes the action too far, resulting in superfluous action sequences that make even catastrophic explosions easily survivable by our heroes, Holmes and Watson. Then again, most of the action scenes are exciting, fast-paced, and fun.

Sherlock Holmes's narrative is full of great comic dialogue and wonderful action but it lacks focus and the mystery elements of the story feel forced. Even though I am entirely impressed with the way that Ritchie has taken an age-old character and freshened him up for a new generation, I wish he had stayed truer to the source material in terms of the detective aspect of the character. For instance, Lord Blackwood, the film's antagonist, is presented as a supernatural cult leader whose resurrection confirms his omnipotence. Although intriguing, this character is too extreme for a traditional Sherlock Holmes story and the manner in which Sherlock Holmes uses his intellect to defeat Blackwood feels like it was an afterthought amongst the screenwriters.

All in all, Sherlock Holmes is a fast-paced, entertaining, stylistically appealing, thrill-ride of a movie. With that said, not much effort was put into pleasing the source material resulting in a film that has more in common with the modern day superhero action genre than the traditional mystery genre. Whether this is detrimental is strictly in the eye of the beholder. This film's only unarguable fault is that it sacrifices substance for style at a pivotal moment in the film (the explosion scene) resulting in visually appealing special effects that fail to warrant realistic consequences for the characters.

THE HONEST TRUTH: This is not your father's Sherlock Holmes. In fact, Ritchie's incarnation of this character has more in common with Batman than the Holmes of old; which seems to be a trend over at Warner Brothers after the success of The Dark Knight. However, although this is unconventional, it works well in providing a great, fast-paced, action movie with enough laughs to keep audiences sufficiently entertained. 3/5

Avatar review

2009-12-23T14:57:00.000-08:00

After watching a South Park episode entitled "Dances with Smurfs" that was created as a spoof of James Cameron's latest film, Avatar, I balked at the presumptuous writing of the South Park team. Who did they think were? How could they parody a movie that was a month away from release without ever having seen it? Unfortunately, it turns out that the South Park episode hit the nail on the head.

Avatar is essentially Dances with Wolves with a ton of expensive special effects. I promise that I am not saying this to be pretentious because the proof lies in the film's narrative: A loyal American soldier is given an assignment that isolates him from his society and engulfs him into the realm of an indigenous people. However, once he interacts with the indigenous he assimilates into their culture and marries one of their women driving him into conflict with his former society. The only difference between the two films, other than the setting, is the action-packed battle sequence at the end of Avatar that pits the Na'vi against the foreign invaders (the humans in this case).

With that said, the visuals in Avatar are every bit as good as James Cameron promised and watching them in 3-D was an amazing experience. The planet Pandora and the creatures living on it are breathtakingly real and the colors are vibrantly phantasmagoric. In addition, the action sequences are compelling and the story does present some provocative ideas about foreign invasion as it pertains to the modern day United States. Furthermore, Avatar also works as a cautionary tale about rabid consumerism resulting in the end of the world.

I admit that the ideas presented in Avatar are compelling; however, the narrative is so content on reaching a massive demographic that it fails to deliver any of its messages intelligently. The result is a politically charged children's movie with a lot of predictable thrills and pretty imagery. With that said, I will admit that I was entertained by Avatar and enjoyed the experience thoroughly. The point is that it does not live up to the hype that is surrounding it.

Avatar is not a groundbreaking creation that will change the face of filmmaking forever. Nothing in this movie is original and we have seen this technology before in better films such as The Lord of the Rings trilogy and Star Trek. The appeal of Avatar is that it successfully blends state of the art animation and blends it with 3-D. Sadly, once Avatar leaves theaters and the 3-D is gone, it will exist only as another run-of-the-mill action flick with a big budget.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Avatar is a good movie, but it is not great. The recycled story and expository dialogue make this movie one that is better left to kids. However, the visuals are amazing and you should check it out if you have the opportunity to see it in 3-D. 3/5

The Road review

2009-12-23T13:58:00.000-08:00

The Road, directed by John Hillcoat, is a chillingly realistic look into the end of the world. Adapted from the Cormac McCarthy novel of the same name, The Road encompasses themes of desperation, family, loyalty, hope and the always important struggle between good and evil. However, The Road is such a deep and carefully crafted story that it manages to magnify the theme of desperation so well that it causes our protagonist to face off against all three of the archetypal conflicts; man vs. man, man vs. nature, and man vs. himself. Although The Road is not the most enjoyable film I've ever watched in terms of traditional entertainment, it very well may be the most important film I have seen all year.

Viggo Mortensen plays the nameless protagonist (credited as "the man") with the highest amount of expertise you will ever find in a movie. Bearded and grimy from years without plumbing or electricity, Mortensen's character rises above the temptation of suicide's release in order to provide a life for his adolescent son (played by Kodi Smit-McPhee). However, in this futuristic world where a blast has destroyed nearly all of humanity, wildlife and vegetation, the remaining population is left desperate and starving; therefore, rape and cannibalism have become commonplace. Furthermore, in order to protect himself and his son, Mortensen's character is constantly at war with his own morality and humanity. This internal struggle and the overwhelming evil surrounding him contributes to the age-old argument of whether man is inherently good or evil. However, the son's generosity and willingness to do good at his own sacrifice bring a ray of hope to this dark world separating The Road from your average "end of the world" fare.

The narrative is told discontinuously with flashbacks to the years before the blast and immediately after it. It is during these sequences that we see the gravity of the man's sacrifice. Having lost his wife and his home to the dire circumstances abounding him and his son, we can understand their journey's purpose as well as the stakes they are up against. Furthermore, the story and performances are so incredible that the audience can easily comprehend their desperation. With every morsel of food the man and his son eat and every ounce of water they put on and into their bodies, we share their relief. No film has ever captured the tone or the mood of a post-apocalyptic world as well as The Road.

Although The Road is mostly dark and dreary it does end well providing a message of hope and a stance that man is inherently good. Without giving anything away I will say that the ending is satisfying and well-crafted; however, a part of me wanted the projector to keep rolling for another two hours to find out what happens next.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The Road is one of the best adaptations I have ever seen and beneath this cautionary tale lies a heartwarming bond between a father and his son. In addition, this film can be dissected thematically just as easily as the literature from which it comes; a true testament to how great this movie is. The Road is the best "end of the world" movie ever made. 5/5

Disney's A Christmas Carol review

2009-12-23T13:36:00.000-08:00

Robert Zemeckis's latest film, Disney's A Christmas Carol, captures the same magic Zemeckis infused into his Back to the Future trilogy and imports it into the world of Dickens; the result is an exhilarating Christmas experience. Never before has Ebenezer Scrooge's world appeared so vibrantly as it does in Disney's A Christmas Carol. Furthermore, Jim Carrey succeeds in bringing Ebenezer and the three spirits to life and the rest of the cast is equally wonderful; the majority of them playing multiple roles!

The true achievement of Disney's A Christmas Carol is not the retelling of a 166 year old story (although they tell it very well), it is the fact that they have used motion capture and 3-D technology in order to showcase the images in a way that feels entirely fresh and adds to the story in a way that was never anticipated. With that said, some of the images are incredibly frightening and may be too intense for smaller children. Then again, anyone who has ever read the Dickens classic knows that it is a very dark story; therefore, the dark imagery is a reflection of the dedication Zemeckis had to his source material when crafting this film.

THE HONEST TRUTH: There's not much I can write about a film many of us have already seen a dozen times in a dozen other incarnations. However, I will say that this film definitely brings something fresh to a classic story in terms of delightfully phantasmagoric imagery and vibrant performances. Although it may be too scary for toddlers and young children, Disney's A Christmas Carol is definitely worth a look. 4/5

Brothers review

2009-12-09T18:26:00.000-08:00

Jim Sheridan's film, Brothers, is a politically charged war drama with a brilliantly relevant message. So often in our society we see such heavy lines drawn between war-supporters and war-protesters that it is hard to fathom the idea that a grey area exists between the two factions. However, Brothers does a wonderful job of broadening the gray area in order to explore themes that both sides can agree on.

Brothers focuses on Sam and Tommy Cahill, a pair of polar opposite brothers living in a small United States town. Sam (Tobey Maguire), the elder brother, leaves his family in order to fulfill his duty as a Marine Captain in Afghanistan and is presumed dead soon after his departure. With Sam gone, Tommy is forced to achieve a significant amount of personal growth in order to tend to the emotional needs of his brother's widow and two young daughters. However, as those who have seen any form of advertising for Brothers already know, Sam is not dead; he is being held prisoner by a group of vengeful Taliban operatives. Needless to say, the story is compelling and Jim Sheridan's expertise finds a directorial home in the brilliantly crafted narrative.

However, the true greatness of the story lies less in the elements that are shown in the advertising. For instance, before entering this film I was anticipating Brothers to be about two brothers fighting over a woman (Natalie Portman), the events of which would culminate into a nightmare for Maguire's character. However, I was delighted to find that the story did not play out this way at all. In fact, the thematic elements of this story are light years ahead of my aforementioned notions in every way.

The stance that Brothers takes on the consequences of war can and will be appreciated by both sides of the political war debate and the effects of seeing these consequences graphically on the screen is profound. In the end, the message of Brothers dignifies all of the sacrifice and bravery our veterans encompass, while still showing the unavoidable psychological effects that war inevitably causes them. In this case, we see Sam, played superbly by Maguire, sacrifice his sanity, his morality and his humanity in order to get home to his wife and children only to find that he is a shell of his former self. It is not a light-hearted message and the context of it is rather extreme; however, it is important for our country to appreciate the psychological gravity of war and Brothers delivers this message perfectly.

THE HONEST TRUTH: With great performances, wonderful character development, an even pace and a relevant message, Brothers is a shot above every other contemporary war drama. Although it does not condemn the Afghanistan War, it does a great job of showing us the consequences of sending our men and women overseas and the adversity they face upon their return. 5/5

The Blind Side review

2009-12-07T12:50:00.000-08:00

The Blind Side, directed by John Lee Hancock, tells the story of an impoverished young man whose life was dramatically changed by a wealthy family that brought him into their home and gave him an opportunity to realize his potential. Although this is a very good film that achieves its goal of inspiring and warming the hearts of audiences, it possesses too many narrative conventions to be great. In many instances The Blind Side sacrifices realism by taming the character interactions in order to make this a family-friendly film.

However, when The Blind Side is not taming the character interactions, it is making them so far-fetched that I have a hard time believing that they actually happened. For instance, Sandra Bullock's character, Leigh Anne Tuohy, is so confident and outspoken in the face of a killer that it makes me wonder how the actual interaction in this so called "true story" went down. Somehow I find it hard to believe that the threat of suburbanites and an NRA membership would be enough to tame a drug dealing gang leader and his minions. Then again, a lot of her interactions seemed far-fetched, therefore, its probably best not to dissect each and every one of them.

Additionally annoying was the character S.J. Tuohy who is the prepubescent son of Bullock's character. S.J.'s overly rambunctious behavior gets old fast and I spent the latter half of the movie wishing his parents would teach him some manners. With that said, his character does play a vital role in both the story progression and the heartwarming factor of The Blind Side, therefore, I fear his annoying behavior may have been a necessary evil in this paint by numbers family film.

Although The Blind Side is far from perfect in terms of utilizing family film narrative conventions, it is still an incredibly heart-warming film. Watching Michael Oher transform from a homeless introvert into a football standout is compelling, but the transformation he makes from an unloved wanderer to the adopted son of the Tuohy family is downright spectacular. The Blind Side reminds us that good deeds do come with great rewards and it shows us why a person's potential should never be overlooked.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The Blind Side is a fun, family-friendly film that will leave you in a great mood. What it lacks in honesty, it makes up for with heart; which it has a lot of. I would recommend The Blind Side to anyone that needs a great feel good movie. 3/5

Precious review

2009-11-23T13:50:00.000-08:00

Lee Daniels has given us a cinematic masterpiece with Precious, a film adaptation of Sapphire's groundbreaking novel, Push. Precious tells the story of a young woman whose situation is so horrific that she has every reason to give up, yet she manages to muster up a super-human amount of courage to persevere in spite of the monstrous abuse she has suffered at the hands of her parents. Led by an amazingly talented cast, this movie is a testament to what can be accomplished with this medium stylistically, thematically, and aesthetically.

First of all, I have to praise the performances in Precious. I was in absolute disbelief that seasoned funny girl, Mo'Nique, turned in an incredible performance as the maliciously abusive mother of Precious. Although this character is the exact opposite of everything Mo'Nique has played thus far, she answers the call by playing her with the unfettered self-indulgence of a true sociopath. In addition, Mariah Carey also exudes some serious acting chops as a social worker attempting to mediate Precious and her mother's damaged relationship. Finally, newcomer Gabourey Sidebe gives a courageous performance as Claireece "Precious" Jones that is as unflattering as it is inspired. Every ounce of pain inside of Precious's soul comes out in Sidebe's wonderfully subtle facial expressions. Did I mention Miss Sidebe had no acting experience prior to her audition for this film? You would never know it because her performance is flawless!

The performances are wonderful all around the board but the stylistic risks that Lee Daniels takes are what add the exclamation point. In addition to the neorealism that Daniels uses to capture Precious's world accurately, he also infuses a secondary world that exists only in Precious's mind. Whenever her emotional pain becomes overwhelming, which sadly is too often, Precious retreats into her world where she is a well-spoken starlet whose thoughts and opinions are universally appreciated. By visualizing this aspect of Precious's mind, Daniels accurately depicts how a lifetime of abuse has caused Precious's mind to fracture.

With an amazing story, a great cast, and an amibitious directorial style, Precious is a wonderful film that will simultaneously disturb and inspire you. Watching the tragic reality of inner-city abuse being swept under the rug by a conniving invalid is not fun; however, it is incredibly profound to watch Claireece "Precious" Jones blossom in the end. Precious is a must watch for film enthusiasts.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Precious is a great film but it is also very raw. There are a lot of very tough scenes of abuse that may be hard for some audiences and the ending, although happy, is shrouded in darkness. However, this is the type of film that awards seasons were meant to honor. Hopefully Precious won't be snubbed when the Oscars come around. 5/5

The Twilight Saga: New Moon review

2009-11-22T23:15:00.000-08:00

After suffering through the chick lit film adaptation that is The Twilight Saga: New Moon, I have gained an enormous amount of sympathy for the director, Chris Weitz. After this enormous franchise was poorly handled by the director of the last film, Catherine Hardwicke, the name of the game was continuity for this ill-fated sequel. The question remained; how does a director improve upon last year’s terrible film while maintaining the continuity that the fans are willing to crucify him over? Unfortunately, there is no right answer to this question when dealing with the Hollywood studio system. In fact, I doubt that the creative reigns of this film were ever in the hands of Chris Weitz to begin with; however, the amount of style that was put into New Moon did manage to jump way ahead of last year’s entry.

As anyone who suffered through the first Twilight film will tell you, the special effects were absolutely awful. In New Moon we no longer have vampires flying through the trees and speed-walking around Bella like a bad 1990’s made-for-TV SciFi channel original. In addition, during New Moon’s fight sequences, I was actually able to find moments of inspired ambition through the use of slow-motion Matrix style shots. Although it is far from original to rip-off The Matrix, I maintain that it was still an ambitious decision by Weitz that paid off by providing an exciting visual experience to fight scenes that were otherwise generic and anti-climactic.

On that note, I will say that the marketing largely contradicts what we are actually given with New Moon. No amount of ridiculously over-blown computer generated wolves can save these brief sparring matches from their unsatisfying doom. The most intense fight scene in this film was told through a flashback that lasted only a few seconds and the confrontation between Edward and the Volturi (vampire leaders) was a huge disappointment that ended abruptly and absent of any tension or excitement.

Another poorly adapted element of New Moon is the relationship between Bella and Jacob. However, even this poorly orchestrated attempt at onscreen romance was still better than the absolute lack of chemistry between Bella and Edward. With that said, I hate to single out New Moon for these problems because it’s likely that much of this can be attributed to the awful casting decisions that went into this franchise in the first place. Robert Pattinson is the most over-rated and uninteresting leading man in Hollywood and Taylor Lautner’s newfound muscles fail to hide an awkwardness that only the most vulnerable of female audiences will be able to forgive.

Dialogue is another area in which New Moon suffers. Many of the lines are on the nose, which means that the characters say things that are way too obvious to be sincere or realistic. Only in a bad Hollywood film will teenagers ever say what is actually on their mind.

Even though New Moon has its share of pitfalls, it has done some things right. Kristen Stewart manages to play Bella Swan with all of the pain and anguish that she deserves and the murkiness of her world is translated well into the film’s surreal landscape. Furthermore, the overly long and incredibly monotonous narrative does find some moments of solace in a setting that is atmospheric and somber enough to provide an escapist sort of feel.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Despite a compelling marketing campaign that makes New Moon feel safe for boyfriends, I can assure you that it’s not safe for anyone except for hardcore fans with a lot of forgiveness in their hearts. However, beneath the overwhelmingly terrible dialogue, slow-pace, and yawn-inducing narrative, lies some moments of true ambition by a director who was faced with one of the most grueling production schedules that Hollywood has to offer. 2/5

2012 review

2009-11-17T11:06:00.000-08:00

After crafting some of the most visually striking disaster movies of the last two decades, it is no surprise that Roland Emmerich's newest apocalyptic action yarn, 2012, is one of the most breathtaking visual epics of the year. However, even with all of the eye-candy 2012 definitely has its share of problems. Repetitive action sequences, preachy dialogue, and an unsubstantiated length make this one more fluff than fun.

2012's narrative unfolds through the eyes of several narrators whose stories eventually intertwine toward the end of the film. The performances and character development, although far from great, are passable albeit forced. However, both the performances and the character actions bottom out near the end, resulting in some of the most unrealistic depictions of human emotion ever put on screen. As the characters lose loved ones to the disasters around them, their emotions remain inexplicably tame. Any more information on the subject would result in spoilers, therefore, I will repress my examples; however, don't say I didn't warn you.

After viewing the first action sequence in 2012 I was enthralled. Then, after viewing the second one I started to get a familiar feeling. After two or three more, I realized that I could only watch John Cusack narrowly jump into an airplane/car/ship so many times before it became dull. With that said, the action sequences are so beautiful that I can easily forgive some of the repetition in order to bask in the visual magnificence.

The dialogue, though generic, was perfectly acceptable for me until the end of the film when it turned into an unapologetic preach-fest. Like Emmerich's 1996 film, Independence Day, 2012 relies heavily on the preconceived notion that the world as we know it must end for everyone to finally get along. Although this is an interesting message it was blatantly recycled from Independence Day and it was less effective in this film since the bad guy was...God?

After reflecting on 2012's errors, I can't help but think that many of them could have been remedied by a shorter length. The entire third act was an uninspired recycling of thematic elements from Emmerich's other films and the action was so mindless that I carefully inspected the credits for the name, Michael Bay. Perhaps if this movie had ended at the midpoint I would have liked it better. At least I wouldn't have had to watch John Cusack's character and his son summon super-human strength in order to fix an ark's gear mechanism with their bare hands. That's right! I said ark! Did we really need religious symbolism in this movie? Probably not. Then again, there's so many things we didn't need in this movie. Did I mention 2012 is way too long?

THE HONEST TRUTH: Calling 2012 outlandish is an insult to outlandish films all over the world. Although it is entertaining at times, it becomes bogged down by a preachy narrative that is way too long for kids and too mind-numbingly stupid for adults. However, it might benefit you to try and ignore the lame story just to enjoy the gorgeous action sequences. 2/5

Couples Retreat review

2009-11-06T11:30:00.000-08:00

Couples Retreat, directed by Peter Billingsley (Ralphie from A Christmas Story), is a film that targets an adult audience, yet it contains a narrative so juvenile that it is barely watchable. After suffering through the entire film, I came out exhausted. The long running time, terrible acting, horrible dialogue, asinine plot devices, and juvenile narrative make Couples Retreat one of the most uninteresting, unintelligent pieces of cinematic garbage that I have ever sat through.

My first issue with Couples Retreat is the god-awful narrative. In a movie that tackles serious issues like divorce and infidelity, I expected a reasonable amount of relatable intelligence. What I got in return was story-telling so bad that it makes Adam Sandler look like Shakespeare. Without dwelling on this too much, I'll tell you that you can expect all of the Vince Vaughn comedy conventions we've grown to know and get really tired of. Sarcasm? Check. Victim of circumstance? Check. Undeserved feeling of entitlement? Check. This movie's story is one step above the main character waking up to realize it was all just a dream and ten steps below anything remotely interesting.

The performances and the dialogue are tied for my second major issue with Couples Retreat because they may be two in the same. Whenever the characters interact, particularly with same-gender conversations, the dialogue reverts to after school special preaching. There is not an honest piece of dialogue in this movie, possibly making it very difficult for the actors to perform. However, whether the dialogue was rotten or not, the actors were stiff as boards and gave completely uninspired performances. Did I mention that I'm sick of Vince Vaughn's schtick? Well there's plenty of it in this movie. Ugh.

My third major issue with Couples Retreat is the long running time. Some of the scenes in this movie are so long and played out that I can't help but wonder how a studio executive, an editor, and a director let them in the final cut. The character's conversations are so circular that I felt like I was watching World Wrestling Entertainment rather than a big-budget Hollywood movie. Furthermore, I'd venture to guess that the acting in WWE couldn't be any worse than Malin Ackerman's in Couples Retreat; not that any of the others are much better. If you are in the mood to watch adults act like obnoxious children for nearly two hours, then this is the movie for you.

After attempting to look at the positive aspects of Couples Retreat, I've chalked it up to just two things. First, it's a good way to see some of Hollywood's hottest starlets in underwear and bikinis; and second, it's a chance to see Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau on the big screen together. Then again, until Vince Vaughn develops a little range or brings back some of his Swingers/Wedding Crashers bad boy charm, then there's not much reason to be all that excited about that.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Never has a movie sparked so many courtesy laughs from an exhausted audience. Couples Retreat is not funny, it is not smart, and it is not entertaining. Do yourself a favor and miss this one at all costs. However, if you do see it I challenge you to find the obvious narrative arc that this one shares with David Fincher's 1997 film, The Game. 1/5

Where the Wild Things Are review

2009-10-17T03:45:00.000-07:00

Spike Jonze's Where the Wild Things Are is a highly stylistic film with very little substance and an indecipherable message. An enthralling first act leads Max into the world of the "wild things" where he must establish himself as king or be destroyed. However, this film never manages to offer a coherent discourse resulting in beautiful images that are shown without motivation resulting in a boring film without any worthwhile tension. Furthermore, the only conflict in the film exists between Max and his mother and it comes as a result of Max's dissatisfaction with his mother's choice in men combined with unresolved emotional pain from his father's death. Unfortunately, this brilliant setup never gets any sort of payoff. After the first act of the film Max's mother's boyfriend is never shown again, nor is his character developed resulting in confusion about why he was introduced into the film at all. In addition, Max's mother is never developed into anything beyond a one-dimensional character whose sole purpose in the film is to motivate Max's journey into the land of the "wild things" and to offer him a piece of cake and comfort upon returning, despite his horrible behavior.

When Max is in the land of the "wild things" the film becomes extremely slow and unmotivated. I could not tell if the wild things were manifestations of Max's personality or if they were strictly arbitrary figments of his imagination. After some deep thought I could argue for either theory, but I cannot justify thinking too deeply about this particular movie. In crafting a script from the beloved children's book from which this movie comes from, it is obvious that the writers, Jonze and Dave Eggers, missed a serious opportunity for some worthwhile storytelling. Instead of giving us a script that shows no consequences for awful adolescent behavior, they could have given us something more; perhaps a script that ventured into the tendency for children to dissociate in times of great peril. However, instead of a metaphor for youthful coping mechanisms we, the audience, have received a lackluster storytelling effort that has sullied the good name of Maurice Sendak's beloved story book.

THE HONEST TRUTH: After leaving the theater one of the children I took to see this movie with me glamorized running away from home by citing that his mother would be grateful to have him back and would hopefully offer him a fresh slice of cake as Max's mother did in the film. With that said, this movie has no discernible message and themes of loss, guilt, and redemption are lost upon the poorly crafted story. However, the visuals were incredibly faithful to the source material and the use of flawless cinematography captured the elegance of Max's world. 2/5

Paranormal Activity review

2009-10-12T20:07:00.000-07:00

Paranormal Activity, directed by Oren Peli, is the most terrifying film that I have ever seen. Using a calculated formula of mockumentary style Blair Witch esque filmmaking, this story is told perfectly and the tension is heightened due to its realistic look and steady pace. However, unlike the Blair Witch Project, the success of this film does not depend on a hoax that it is real found footage rather than a low-budget mockumentary. With that said, the success of this film comes in the form of a perfectly crafted, well-edited, story that the director of the Blair Witch Project laid the foundation for but was far from mastering.

Although the performances in Paranormal Activity are top-notch and the story is interesting, this movie's style is what sets it above the other horror films on the market. It stands as living proof that excessive blood, gore, and frightening imagery is no match for the power of imagination. By using the tried and true Spielberg circa Jaws technique of showing as little of the monster as possible, Peli leaves the audience in a permanent state of suspense.

Paranormal Activity succeeds on every level that a horror film could. It is fresh, original, and capitalizes on a style of horror film-making that had not been perfected until now. The tension in this film is perfect and the state of the characters goes from bad to worse to horrible, resulting in an incredible story arc proving once and for all that mockumentary style film-making can translate just as well into horror as it has in comedy.

THE HONEST TRUTH: If you like horror movies, then go see Paranormal Activity. Just know that it is incredibly frightening; don't say I didn't warn you. 5/5.

Zombieland review

2009-10-09T12:09:00.000-07:00

Never has a dark comedy looked as fresh as it does in Ruben Fleischer's Zombieland. To be clear, when I say "fresh" I'm not trying to make a clever pun that juxtaposes the high level of gore with the high level of originality. Just kidding! That's exactly what I'm doing and I'm not even going to apologize for it. With that said, Zomblieland is spectacular in every way imaginable. The writers, Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick, have done an amazing job of crafting a terrifying world while still maintaining all of the satirical elements that make this film light-hearted and fun.

Every element of this film is done well. The writing, the direction, the performances, and the special effects all come together in a unique mash-up that satisfies my horror, action, and comedy cravings simultaneously. However, before everything else I have to give extreme kudos to the writing. Not once did I question a character's motivation or any piece of dialogue in Zombieland. In addition, I never felt like the humor took anything away from the horror or vice versa.

Secondly, I must give credit to the unique directorial style that Fleischer used when tackling Zombieland. Our reluctant hero, Columbus, has made a set of rules for himself in order to survive in this post-apocalyptic mess of a world, and throughout the course of the film, his rules are posted on-screen as they occur. For the sake of making a spoiler-free review, I will not elaborate on this, but I will say that it is a gutsy directorial decision that pays off for the sake of comic-relief. In addition, the amount of gore is exaggeratedly wonderful and adds to the campiness of the overall product.

Thirdly are the wonderful performances. If Michael Cera watches Jesse Eisenburg's neurotic portrayal of Columbus without worrying for his own career a little bit, then I will be surprised. Throughout Zombieland, Eisenburg plays the role of lovable nerd flawlessly. Next is the great Woody Harrelson, who channels all of his backwoods redneck charm to give us the all-American zombie killing machine known only as Tallahassee. Fueled only by his hatred for zombies and his love of twinkies, Tallahassee is a character that is easy to cheer for. Equally interesting are Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin who play two scamming sisters with the instincts to survive in this harsh world. As much as I'd like to end my sterling review of the performances with that, I just can't help but prepare you just a little for the best cameo since Will Ferrell in The Wedding Crashers. All I can say is that it's as wonderful as it is unexpected.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The reason that every movie on the market is either a reboot or an adaptation of a successful video game, comic book, or novel, is because Hollywood is petrified of risking money on an original idea. Thankfully Zombieland has shown all of us that a fun and original idea can be worth more than all of the 100 year old licenses producers keep buying. If you've got a stomach for horror and want to see something original, then you can't go wrong with Zombieland. 5/5

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell review

2009-10-02T14:27:00.000-07:00

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell is the most honest look into the world of womanizing, drinking, and debauchery that a person will find on the big screen. An account of Tucker Max's real life experiences, this film raises the bar for raunchy guy comedies by presenting highly exaggerated, yet highly realistic characters. With that said, this movie is incredibly uncomfortable at times and contains a hard R rating that should be taken into consideration by more conservative audience members.

As it stands, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell is criticized by feminist groups for its positive depiction of Tucker Max's uncaring womanizing ways. They've even gone so far as to accuse Tucker Max, played enthusiastically by Matt Czuchry, of rape due to the fact that many of his sexual partners are intoxicated. However, as all of us free-wheeling party types know, this is terribly inaccurate. If a person is not allowed to get drunk, murder someone, and then plead intoxication as a defense, then why should they be allowed to blame intoxication for any other bad decisions they make including questionable sexual partners?! Granted, the situation would be different if Tucker was some sort of a date rapist. With that said, Tucker Max is not a date rapist, he's just a single guy without a conscience trying to get lucky. In fact, often times it is his own loud mouthed obnoxious behavior that keeps him from succeeding in his goals.

Although failure is more often than not a reality for Tucker in his quest for carnal pleasure, he never seems to be fazed by rejection. The deeper message is to be resilient. If all of us could treat our failures as well as Tucker Max treats his, then eventually success would walk into our lives much in the way that a stripper midget (their word, not mine) walks into the life of Tucker Max in this film.

In addition to themes of resiliency, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell also takes a contemporary look into modern American relationships from a male perspective using characters taken from real-life. Tucker's wingmen are Swimfan alum, Jesse Bradford, and Geoff Stultz who play Drew and Dan respectively. Jesse Bradford's Drew is a caricature of every man who has been jilted by a woman. Although good lurks behind his haughty exterior, he is content with hating women as a defense mechanism for heartbreak. Geoff Stultz's Dan is a different story entirely. Entering the world of marriage, Dan is whisked away by Tucker for bachelor party shenanigans. However, after realizing that his married life holds no place for Tucker's immaturity, Dan is forced to make a choice between Tucker and his marriage resulting in a coming-of-age debacle that only Tucker can resolve.

The characters in I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell are extremely well-crafted and the dialogue is fantastic. In a brilliant act of direction by Bob Gosse, we watch Tucker get louder as he gets drunker resulting in him offending women, yet not caring one bit. I will admit that the material is of a sensitive nature, however, in Tucker's world consequences exist and, in the end, his humanity comes to the surface.

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell is a raw, brave, gritty, and offensive look into the mind of a womanizer. It is hilarious, disgusting, and absolutely successful at depicting a sect of American life that is too often turned into a caricature of Stiffler proportions. After watching Tucker alienate both women and his friends, I realized that no part of this movie glamorizes his lifestyle, but rather chooses to expose it for what it is; a shitty way to live.

THE HONEST TRUTH: With all of the debauchery aside, this film earns its merits by presenting wonderfully crafted themes of consequences, redemption, and coming-of-age. However, the lack of a sympathetic protagonist makes this drink hard to swallow during more than a few moments. 4/5

Sorority Row review

2009-10-02T14:06:00.000-07:00

Sorority Row, directed by Stewart Hendler, is a fantastic comedy that belongs on a top ten list of funniest movies of the year. Did I mention that Mr. Hendler was trying to make a horror film? Ouch! However, the material that stands at the foundation of this film is awful; therefore, the only people to blame for this atrocity are the ones who run the Hollywood machine. In other words, this film never EVER should gotten a green light.

My biggest gripe with Sorority Row is its contention with mediocrity. With the exception of a thought-provoking opening sequence, this film follows the slasher formula religiously and never bothers to push the genre anywhere new. Sadly, by the end of Sorority Row I could no longer appreciate the dilemma the girls faced in the beginning of the film because I had been overwhelmed by bad dialogue and an ending so terrible that it made the entire audience laugh.

As bad as this film truly is, it can be dissected into a worthwhile message about mankind's tendency to succumb to the whim of a group mind. Throughout the course of Sorority Row, sisterhood is used as an excuse for the terrible behavior of the characters and they operate collectively with all of their decision-making. Being that the group's decision to cover up the death of Audrina Patridge's character violated the majority of their personal belief systems, it can be concluded that the group mind was what served as the catalyst for the characters' eventual destruction. Then again, slasher films have been draped over morality tales ever since their inception in the late 1970's, therefore, this film still does nothing that it's predecessors haven't done better.

With that said, director Stewart Hendler did put forth a substantial effort when faced with the challenge of polishing the the turd that is Sorority Row. For instance, he builds an extraordinary amount of tension during the scene in which the characters are faced with the life-altering dilemma of whether or not to cover up their friend's murder. In addition, the film opens with a prestigious camera choice by implementing a Boogie Nights style tracking shot that follows all of the characters through the Theta Pi house during a raucous party. However, the craftsmanship only lasts so long due to the horrible material that Mr. Hendler was forced to work with and the film ultimately falls flat.

THE HONEST TRUTH: This movie is extremely campy and chalked full of T & A. Aside from the first act, the story is ludicrous and the ending is unintentionally hilarious. Watching Rumer Willis channel her father's gun-toting Die Hard persona in order to save the day is priceless. If only it had come with a "Yippee Kiyay Motherfucker!" for good measure. 2/5

The Final Destination review

2009-09-13T14:25:00.000-07:00

When reviewing David R. Ellis's The Final Destination, I feel it is best to offer a little backstory into the machine that continues to crank out these highly predictable, highly gory, films. The Final Destination series of movies is comparable in many ways to the Saw series of movies. In both horror franchises the story is sacrificed for shock value that exists in the form of grotesque special effects. People see these movies with the same attitude that they take with them into a McDonald's restaurant; they know it won't be spectacular and it'll probably give them a stomach ache, but at least they'll leave satisfied.

In case my McDonald's analogy didn't hit the mark for you, I'd like to make it clear that The Final Destination is completely lacking of 3-dimensional characters, brings nothing new to the series except for gimmicky 3-D glasses (the only 3-dimensional aspect of this film), yet still manages to bring us the most satisfying death scenes in cinema. However, with this fourth installment in the series, some of the devices used to create these deaths have been recycled and the tension and suspense of the series' first entry has been lost. Furthermore, in 3-D some of the deaths look cartoonish and unrealistic; most notably when a man's body is pressed through a chain-link fence resulting in perfectly diamond shaped pieces of flesh. It seems as though the animators closed the door on realism and instead looked to an ultra-violent Itchy and Scratchy cartoon for inspiration.

The team responsible for this repetitious experiment in shock-horror fare is made up of director David R. Ellis and writer Eric Bress, both of whom also brought us Final Destination 2. With that said, The Final Destination is a step up from their previous effort. It seems as though these two gentlemen decided that a complete lack of story was better than the ludicrous narrative that they gave us in Final Destination 2, and I must admit that they are right about that. However, The Final Destination's arc is frustratingly identical to the first and third installments in the series and by now it's little more than an excuse to watch cleverly excruciating death scenes.

THE HONEST TRUTH: If you're reading this review then you've probably seen at least one of the other installments in the series. With that in mind, you either like watching the exotic deaths that this series showcases or you don't. In the off chance that you are new to the series, please don't expect any depth. The Final Destination is a brainless horror film that does more shocking than scaring. The only semblance of an original idea here was the decision to shoot it in 3-D, which resulted in some good R-rated fun. 2/5

9 review

2009-09-13T13:32:00.000-07:00

Beneath the aesthetic perfection of Shane Acker's animated science fiction film, 9, lies a cautionary tale about the dangers of war and the fragility of life on Earth. However, as 9 begins the narrative immediately takes a back seat to the wonderfully animated world and the terrifyingly suspenseful action sequences. Although both the animation and the conception of Acker's world is flawless, not all of the story elements fall into place and questions are raised without ever being answered clearly.

With that said, I would like to draw attention to the stellar voice work, which consists of top notch performances by Elijah Wood, John C. Reilly, Jennifer Connelly, and the rest of the voice cast. For me, the most satisfying part of 9 was watching the animation flow seamlessly with the dialogue, resulting in truly life-like characters.

For the most part, the character motivations are clear and well-developed enough to tell a compelling story and the themes that lay under the narrative are relevant and thought provoking. However, the narrative itself is jumbled with unanswered questions and major plot-holes. In addition, the relevant mythology that Acker created finds its home in an irrelevant setting of World War II era Russia rather than a provocative post-World War III type setting. As a result, this cautionary tale becomes just another good vs. evil yarn with a beautifully animated backdrop.

THE HONEST TRUTH: This is a good movie that should be remembered for pushing the limits of computer generated 3-D animation. However, the story, although fun, is not perfect. With a running time of a modest 91 minutes, I feel like 9 could have delivered a bit more depth. However, as far as PG-13 children's fare goes, this one is top-notch and anyone with imagination and even a slight appreciation for quality animation will have a good time. With that said, leave the smaller children at home because 9 may be too frightening for them. 3/5

Halloween 2 review

2009-09-04T18:37:00.000-07:00

After Rob Zombie's complete overhaul of the Halloween franchise with his 2007 film conventionally titled, Halloween, my expectations for his new addition to the series, Halloween 2, were ambiguous. On one hand, the first act of his 2007 film was epic due to its psychological journey into Michael Myers' boyhood traumas; but on the other hand, the second and third acts of Halloween played out very much like a run-of-the-mill slasher film. Don't get me wrong: I very much liked the 2007 remake of Halloween. Zombie's use of narrative gave us a traditional slasher film complete with supernatural elements and added something completely inventive; a believable backstory that traveled into the psychology of the antagonist. However, my biggest gripe with the first movie was that it missed the mark on everything that makes Rob Zombie unique as a director; his ability to combine classic horror with a heavy metal edge. With that said, Halloween 2 never fails to deliver Rob Zombie's signature style and it is greater for it.

Halloween 2 is not a perfect horror film, however, it's pretty darn close. Continuing right where Zombie's first entry left off, we watch Laurie Strode get wheeled into the hospital following the gruesome attack she suffered at the hands of her relentless brother. After a very rough night at the hospital the narrative shoots us forward by nearly a year as Laurie attempts to surpass the psychological trauma she suffered during the previous year's Halloween night. Leading into the current Halloween, Laurie unravels the mystery of her true identity and learns that her link with Michael might be deeper than blood.

In addition to some coy references to his heavy metal roots, Rob Zombie's style oozes from the screen of Halloween 2 by providing some Zombie inspired costumes, make-up, story-elements, and best of all, gore. Furthermore, Michael Myers possesses an inhuman level of brutality that is shockingly realistic. With every crunch, pop and slice, Rob Zombie adds every ounce of realism possible to make for a chilling display of violence.

The symbols and stylistic elements thrown into Halloween 2 are anything but conventional, however, Zombie chooses to courageously take the risk of introducing them anyway. The last time I saw a director introduce so much of his own style into a pre-existing franchise was in Tim Burton's Batman Returns, which was uncomfortably dark for its time but also an incredible directorial effort. Aside from a few frustrating narrative conventions, this film hits its mark as Zombie's best film and with him removed from the director's chair for the upcoming Halloween 3D, I am completely satisfied with this film's ending as the completion to his Halloween franchise.

THE HONEST TRUTH: This film is a frighteningly brutal jaunt into the mind of Michael Myers (or perhaps Rob Zombie) filmed with a very unique style that fuses raw brutality, classic horror, and heavy metal. Although the violence and nudity (which are both plentiful) may be too much for some audience members, those who love horror films will love this movie for its refreshingly new take on the otherwise tired slasher genre. The story isn't perfect but its very intense and shocking enough to entertain even the most avid fans of horror. 4/5

Inglourious Basterds review

2009-08-23T12:27:00.000-07:00

Quentin Tarantino's World War II fantasy epic, Inglourious Basterds, rewrites the history books, packs in tons of violence, is loaded with razor sharp dialogue, and maintains every ounce of Tarantino's signature film-making style. Each tension filled scene is better than the one before it, making this film a true masterpiece of avant-garde (experimental) cinema. With that said, Tarantino is asking a lot of his audience in terms of intellect.

Don't let the over-the-top blood and violence spilling from the screen fool you into thinking this is a brain dead summer popcorn flick. In fact, many will find the dialogue heavy scenes and the complex narrative challenging. However, in exercising a bit of patience you will find that scenes have not been written any better than the ones in Inglourious Basterds. With that said, it is important for me to point out that the writing is not perfect over all. At times character motivations became unclear and I left the film wanting to see more of the basterds. Then again, there's nothing in this film that I would take out under any circumstances, therefore, I am fairly certain that Tarantino had to limit the basterd's camera time in order to achieve a reasonable length. Hopefully there will be more of the basterds on the DVD.

In addition to a remarkable story and the best scenes ever written, this film is complete with extraordinarily charming performances by everyone involved. If you're looking to see a bad performance, then Inglourious Basterds is not the film for you. First and foremost is Brad Pitt, who shows a fantastic knack for character acting with his portrayal of Aldo Raine, the brutal albeit comical leader of the basterds. In addition, Michael Fassbender, Melanie Laurent, and Denis Menochet also get honorable mentions from me for their standout performances in the film. However, the most brilliant acting performance in the film comes from Christoph Waltz who humorously and terrifyingly brings the character, Hans Landa, to life before our very eyes. Bringing every piece of archetypal German nuance to the character while still embodying all of the evils associated with his unofficial title, The Jew Hunter, Waltz gives a performance that will be remembered for decades.

Finally, I have to send a warning to all of those history buffs who will undoubtedly hate this film for its purposefully inaccurate depiction of the events of World War II. This film officially offers nothing to historical academia (with the exception of the first scene, which accurately depicts the terror imposed by the brutal Nazi regime) and it never intends to. Instead, it is a comical jaunt into World War II fantasy and I do believe that after watching this film, many will be disappointed that the war didn't play out more like the one in Inglourious Basterds; however, that's just my own personal speculation.

Then again, this film provides a great service to another facet of academia by showing young film-makers the sheer range that this medium can achieve when used properly. Everything from the music to the lettered headings feels largely out of place, yet it all works brilliantly in the context of this film. Once again, Mr. Tarantino has delivered a uniquely unconventional gem of a film with Inglourious Basterds that will be hated by some but loved by many.

THE HONEST TRUTH: The dialogue is perfect, the story is well-written, the mise-en-scene (use of the camera) is brilliant, and the music choices are wonderfully unconventional. However, in Inglourious Basterds, Tarantino really takes his time; which requires a lot of patience from the audience. The violence, although excessive and satisfying, often takes a backseat to the superfluous dialogue thus challenging the intellectual capacity of the audience. This is a must-see for film enthusiasts but it will exhaust those in search of an action flick. 4/5

District 9 review

2009-08-16T21:12:00.000-07:00

Neill Blomkamp's District 9 sets out to accomplish several objectives and, for the most part, it succeeds on all levels. First and foremost, I commend this film for its ability to recreate the terror of apartheid while still managing to provide us with an action-packed summer blockbuster that makes Roland Emmerich's Independence Day look like Justin Lecair's last Independence Day; which was spent at his mother in law's house eating hamburgers. Furthermore, the visual choices that Blomkamp makes are extremely unique providing a mash up of documentary style footage, traditional Hollywood cinema, and phony news broadcasts. Although this experimentation in film form caused me to fear another disaster of Cloverfield proportions, the techniques used by Blompkamp fused incredibly well and resulted in a surprisingly smooth discourse.

With that said, the problems that I have with this film are mostly story related ones. For instance, the action begins after the protagonist, Wikus, is sent into District 9 to evict its alien tenants only to mistakenly douse himself with toxic extraterrestrial goo. Before long, Wikus notices the goo has turned his left arm into an identical incarnation of an alien arm; and to make matters worse, his entire body is overrun with alien DNA that enables him to use insanely high powered alien weaponry. The nonsensical part comes when the government decides that instead of using this highly loyal government official to operate the alien weaponry on their behalf, they should kill him instead. Huh? Yep. You heard it. The government finally gets what it wants and then tries to cut it into tiny little pieces, thus resorting back to the old cliche of the government finding what it wants only to cut it into tiny little pieces. Then again, the fuzzy plot points still succeed by turning the tables on the once bigoted Wikus by thrusting him into District 9 where he learns how difficult it is to be stalked by an unruly government.

Following Wikus through the slums of District 9 is enjoyable and watching him suffer is made easier by the fact that he was an unsympathetic bureaucratic tool during the first act of the film. However, before long this movie becomes a jumbled mess of action that shrouds a generic story of an alien wanting to return to his home planet. Then again, the jumbled mess of action is an incredibly well done jumbled mess of action and watching Wikus fight to the death wearing a mechanical suit is exhilarating. Furthermore, the cinematography during the action sequences is reminiscent of the shaky camera used in Blackhawk Down and Saving Private Ryan, providing a high level of realism that makes a welcome contrast with the surrealistic story. The visuals were so flawless that I never once felt like I was watching computer generated images.

Even with all of its successes this film does fall victim to what I like to call the curse of Peter Jackson: when a film pushes the limits of technology and visual perfection so far that it completely supersedes reason. This term comes from the tendency of Peter Jackson to put his protagonists against odds so remarkable that it becomes difficult for us to fathom that he/she could survive such an ordeal. In King Kong this happened to our human travelers as they conquered the perilous Skull Island and in the Lord of the Rings it happened when the armies of good prevailed against the overwhelming forces of Sauron relatively unscathed. Despite the fact that Peter Jackson settled for merely a producer credit this time around, the curse still stretches into District 9 as we watch our protagonists narrowly escape barrages of gunfire and endure seemingly devastating wounds and still survive to fight again.

Although the plot in which menacing government officials destroying unlucky victims of circumstance is nothing new in cinema, it was used well in this movie providing a well done metaphor for apartheid. However, the welcome twist of the alien oppressor becoming the alien oppressed was an interesting bit of role reversal that makes this film truly unique.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Despite all of my critical nitpicking, this is truly a unique and extraordinary film. The action, although excessive, comes packaged with top-notch special effects and the story is unique enough to make a statement and familiar enough to entertain. The only downfall is that it becomes a full on action film toward the end, which some people may find too extreme. However, if you like action, science-fiction, or a well-done blockbuster (I'd say most of us do) then this one is for you. 4/5

The Ugly Truth review

2009-08-13T14:25:00.000-07:00

Everyone who has seen an advertisement for Robert Luketic's The Ugly Truth knows that this movie sets out to honestly dissect the nature of relationships between men and women. The honest truth is that it succeeds entirely, however, this is not a groundbreaking filmmaking tactic by any means. There are lots of romantic comedies that have depicted men as hyper-physical sex hounds and women as over-emotional pains in the butt, only to have them fall in love despite it all. The Ugly Truth gives us this very story along with virtually every convention of a romantic comedy only with a different setting and characters. There is no way to watch this movie without feeling like you've watched a better version of it already. With that said, Gerard Butler and Katherine Heigl have good chemistry and they fearlessly own up to the film's raunchy subject matter by delivering some very funny scenes.

THE HONEST TRUTH: If you like romantic comedies and don't mind raunchy humor, then this one's for you. Women will like it because Katherine Heigl's character is relatable enough to sympathize with and quirky enough to laugh at; and men won't mind it because there's enough sexual innuendo to please our sophomoric senses of humor. However, this formulaic romp through heterosexual relationships is little more than a money-making device; in a year no one will remember it even existed. You might like it, but I promise you won't love it. 2/5

500 Days of Summer review

2009-08-13T01:45:00.000-07:00

Marc Webb has finally given us the great American love story with 500 Days of Summer. Actually, he's only given us half of a love story, which isn't to say that this is a bad film. In fact, it's quite the contrary. This is a great film and the reason that it's only half of a love story is because only one person falls in love. Please don't feel as though I've ruined anything for you. It's made clear near the beginning of the film that "this is not a love story" and that things are going to end badly for the two lovers; who are brilliantly played by a wide-eyed Joseph Gordon Levitt and a more pessimistic than usual Zooey Deschanel. However, where this film truly shines above the rest is in the fact that it provides insight into the majority of most modern day relationships. What insight you ask? They don't usually work out! Our society isn't made up of millions of people who married their first love; it's made up of millions of people that have endured failed relationships and struggled to move forward. Yet for some reason, at the end of every romantic comedy, the two main characters always wind up together. Well not this time.

This film flips the genre conventions of a romantic comedy upside down by giving us two characters who behave refreshingly realistic.

This brings me to my only problem with the film; it's hard to sympathize with either of the characters. First, we have Tom, who refuses to accept the fact that Summer is just not that into him. Throughout the course of the film, Tom's relentless love for Summer becomes more pathetic than romantic to the point that it becomes difficult to root for him. Secondly, there is Summer. Oh Summer. Why art thou such a terrible biotch? Summer is the girl that we have all fallen in love with at some point in our lives only to have our noses rubbed in it at the end of the day. There is never a doubt that she is stringing Tom along and it becomes frustrating watching him endure all of her heartless games. Then again, it's his fault for being such a pushover, right? Maybe, but who hasn't fallen victim to their own emotions at one point or another. 500 Days of Summer is a refreshing glimpse into the world of heartbreak that tells the romantic victim in all of us that we're not alone.

THE HONEST TRUTH: Although this is not a love story, it is a surprisingly funny story that offers a unique insight into the nature of modern day relationships by examining a failed one. However, the strengths of this film may wind up ultimately defeating it. After all, not a lot of men want to see a romantic comedy in the first place, and very few women want to see a romantic comedy about a failed relationship. Then again, for film buffs this is a must-see and somewhere underneath it's surface is a genuine guy movie that most men should be able to relate to. With that said, I'd like to warn the ladies out there that this movie doesn't do your team any favors. Zooey Deschanel's portrayal of Summer provides a depiction of women as being emotionally removed and callous predators who heartlessly suck the life out of nice guys like Tom; whether this is true or not depends on your perspective. This movie is definitely for people who like to talk about movies, therefore, I loved it. If that's not you, then prepare to be disappointed. 4/5

A Perfect Getaway review

2009-08-13T01:12:00.000-07:00

Back in 1999 M. Night Shyamalan directed a wonderful movie called The Sixth Sense. The highlight of this movie was, of course, the highly unpredictable "twist" ending. Bruce Willis was a ghost? However, the brilliance of Shyamalan's "twist" ending was that it was entirely unexpected yet completely plausible at the same time. Much like Shyamalan's landmark film, The Perfect Getaway intends to cash in on one of these clever "twist" endings and they certainly got the unexpected part right. However, they didn't seem to get the part where it has to be plausible. In this film, there are entire scenes that completely contradict the third act of the film to the point of being entirely erroneous. However, even with a broken narrative this film succeeds on several different levels ranging from the unique Hawaiian (albeit Puerto Rican?) setting to the engaging performances by the entertaining cast. For instance, Steve Zahn and Timothy Olyphant define contradiction with the way their characters interact throughout the course of the film; Zahn with nerdy abandon and Olyphant with rugged machismo that stretches all the way back to the mainland. Moments between the two men grew so tense at times that I literally felt uncomfortable in the sanctuary of my comfy seat at the Burbank AMC. It was wonderful! Then again, I wish I could say the same for the movie as whole. Telling you to "suspend your disbelief" while watching this film is asking far too much of you. Nothing about the third act of this film resonates logically, the character motivations are non-existent and the story contradicts itself constantly resulting in a frustrating waste of time.

THE HONEST TRUTH: This movie is a lot of fun and comes with an action-packed punch of an ending. However, I cannot recommend it to an adult audience in good conscience. Although Steve Zahn and Timothy Olyphant shine as two vacationers (one a killer, one a lover) traveling through paradise with their beloveds, this film does not get by on character development and performances alone. The ending is so ridiculously contrived that I wondered what 9 year old phoned it in. If you are a die-hard fan of Steve Zahn, Timothy Olyphant, or Milla Jovovich, then this one's for you. Otherwise, you better avoid it because this getaway is anything but perfect. 2/5

Julie and Julia review

2009-08-13T00:38:00.000-07:00

Aw, Meryl. You make bad movies good and good movies great. Fortunately for us audience members, Meryl Streep has once again worked her magic with Julie and Julia. Standing as a refreshing hybrid to the otherwise stale genre's of period comedy and romantic comedy, this film gives Streep a chance to shine as the all-but-forgotten prototypal cooking show host, Julia Child. Split into two halves, this film tells the story of Julie, a low-level post 9/11 clean-up operator who commits herself to the culinary arts through the literary wisdom of the aforementioned Julia Child, and Julia Child, who after moving to France with her husband needs something to do; why not publish the premier book on French cuisine? This movie is as appetizing as it is entertaining. Watching Meryl Streep become Julia Child before your very eyes is mesmerizing, however, the Julie moments of the film are less extraordinary albeit a shot above a casual romantic comedy. If nothing else, this movie is an inspiration to anyone who ever aspired to something above the mediocre.

THE HONEST TRUTH: This is a uniquely entertaining movie. It can become slow during a few of the Julie parts but Meryl Streep and Amy Adams are two extremely talented women and it shows. Overall, Julie and Julia is an above average movie for it's clever use of narrative and it's great performances; including Stanley Tucci's wonderful turn as Julia's utterly adoring husband. Certain men will not like this movie for it's lack of fast pace, action, and sex-appeal, however, I believe that most audience members will really enjoy it; if you're a woman you are almost guaranteed to like it. 3/5

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra review

2009-08-12T22:30:00.000-07:00

As a former fan of the children's television series that grew to fame under the same name in the 1980's for it's cheese heavy spin on military action adventure, it is important for me, and others like me, to realize just how evolved children's entertainment has come over the last twenty years; however, the creators of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra must have missed the memo. In a world where children have kept up with the week to week continuity of X-Men, Dragon Ball Z, and countless other plot heavy animated children's series, I find it difficult to believe that the contemporary adolescent is simple enough to fall for G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra; then again, the special effects go a long way. Even though I tried my best to like this movie, there just wasn't a whole lot in there for me to even kinda like. First and foremost is the painstakingly stale acting performances given by the entire cast (Sorry Mr. Levitt but you're not excluded here). In addition, to say that Dennis Quaid and Channing Tatum phoned in their performances would only suggest that they had some sort of superior acting ability to begin with. They don't. Then again, Brando himself couldn't have saved the dialogue in this movie. On that note, if you choose to suffer through the bad acting and mind-numbing narrative, it is important to continually remind yourself that you are watching an adaptation (albeit a lackluster one) of a 20 year old children's cartoon show. However, rather than evolving with the tastes of modern day children, this movie's story feels like it was thrown together in a week; much like a 1980's children's cartoon show.

I suppose the foremost problem with the film is the lack of character development. Series favorites such as Snake Eyes, Duke, Cobra Commander, and General Hawk are all here, but not in all (or even some) of their glory. The character interactions are superfluous and disjointed. Two characters in particular, Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow, seem only to exist for the purpose of battling at the end of the film. Furthermore, the film's main antagonist, Cobra Commander, is cartoonish and lacks a clear motive for being evil. It seems as though he is evil for the sake of being evil much like The Emperor from Star Wars: Return of the Jedi or Sauron from The Lord of the Rings. Why are they evil? Who the Hell knows? But they are, and the audience must accept it. Ugh.

At times G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra feels more like an experiment in 1980's neo-kitch, rather than an actual attempt at film-making. With that said, even though this film is terrible by every standard put in place by the modern day film community, it does have one thing going for it; a monster budget that afforded a ton of special effects. If you are capable of suffering through the nonsensical story, complete with flashbacks that poorly attempt to develop the conflict between the tortured Cobra Commander and the chiseled Duke, then you are in for a treat of fast-paced action sequences where everything from space-like aircrafts to the Eiffel Tower are blown to bits. If you are a prepubescent boy who thirsts for action that is just below the R-rated level, then this movie is for you. However, if you are an 18-30 year old fanboy who is hoping that director, Sommers, recreated some of the animated G.I. Joe's youthful exuberance with this film, then you are kidding yourself.

THE HONEST TRUTH: If you have young boys, then take 'em. They'll love the action and probably won't ask too many questions. But this movie is better left with children. Adults will find the simplistic story inconsistent and filled with devastating plot holes; not to mention some very familiar action sequences that have been done better with an R rating. 1/5

Criticizing the world one movie at a time

2009-08-12T22:05:00.000-07:00

After graduating from film school and watching all of the films that a movie aficionado like myself is supposed to enjoy, I couldn't help but wonder how the rest of the world (people who haven't been scholastically programmed to appreciate the slightest nuance of every film on the market) are supposed to pick out which big budget flick to invest their ten bucks on each and every weekend. The idea of creating a versatile movie critiquing community came to me after screening my personal DVD copy of The Godfather to my beloved girlfriend. Before the one hour mark of the film, the girl was already fast asleep causing me to cower under a shroud of disappointment and disbelief. How could I love someone who could fall asleep while watching my idea of the best film ever created? I'll tell you how! It's because what appeals to a 24 year old film critic differs greatly from what appeals to a 23 year old make up artist. Think about it. Although the shots, story structure, acting, and impeccable directorial style make the Godfather a hall of fame motion picture in my eyes, it's also very long, ends on a sour note, and fails to deliver a compelling love story. Granted, those three negative points enhanced the viewing experience for me, however, they absolutely ruined the film for my contemporary minded girlfriend. The point I'm trying to make is that every individual watches a movie differently. Furthermore, movies are the reflection of the moods, ideas, values, and preferences of our society, however, they are also made for the purpose of entertainment. My commitment is to find the right entertainment for the right individual. Therefore, after each of my critiques I will give a simple summary of what precise demographic, if any, will enjoy the film under review. Trust me. I'm a college graduate for God sakes.